Another year gone and another started and so many people will have made New Year Resolutions for themselves that are both personal and have an impact on their family and friends and their business relationships too. What a shame then that most of these well meaning thoughts dissipate into thin air within a few days or weeks. Maybe it’s down to making too many resolutions or not really meaning them in the first place – or maybe it’s because they don’t really mean that much to the person making them. What if the resolutions were borne out of the person themselves, they would be meaningful wouldn’t they?
Let’s get back to the basics. We can only control what we do and the way we behave. It’s a waste of time setting a resolution or objective that is outside our control. The impact we have as individuals is far wider than many of us realize whether it’s at home or in the workplace with colleagues or with clients.
How do others receive the messages we consciously and unconsciously send out? Well, the conscious messages of voice and body language (can be unconscious too if we aren’t careful) are supplemented by e-mail, phone calls, social media to name but a few and these have the ability to multiply our impact whether we like it or not. In the case of social media we actually have very little control or indeed idea of what happens the moment we send a tweet or make a Facebook status update.
Unconsciously we send out messages and signals to others. The people we don’t interact with for whatever reason may take some meaning from that as will those who we do talk to. We can’t control these conversations and the perceptions of others but we ought to be aware that they exist in all spheres of our lives; family, friends and business. Family and particularly close friends who know us really well will have a good understanding of our behaviour and will recognize and compensate for when we might not be ‘at our best’. The same cannot be said for business relationships – a tetchy response or an e-mail sent in haste (hopefully not anger) can kill off a relationship.
So what has all this got to do with setting ourselves up for the New Year ahead? It may sound strange but if we are a little selfish and focus more on ourselves and how we behave and take time to reflect on interactions and consider future interactions there is every possibility that our family, friends and business relationships will not only survive, they will blossom. Go on, be selfish and give yourself time.